For years I was fire
Sparks on gasoline
Watch out
Might get burned
Unpredictable
Destructive
Wanting to explode
Like flash paper
I could ignite
And go dark
Just as fast
Burned out
Burned up
Nothing left
I loved the heat
The power
To cook
Or warm
Or kill
The crackling life force
Changing whatever it touched
To light
Energy
Smoke
And ash
I lived like a Phoenix
Rising From the ashes
Soaring for a moment
Or a while
Then self immolating
Burning up
Becoming ash again
And again
But as I’ve grown
And expanded
Other elements have come
The winds that stoked the fire
Have lessened
And the Phoenix became a Crow
Flying with a murder
Of fellow ex-phoenix
On the breeze of wisdom
And maturity
I learned to walk the earth
Rest upon solid rock
And be nurtured
By the sun
And watered by the rain
But the water scared me
I feared it would put out
My secret fire
The flame I kept hidden
Just in case
I needed to pull
The old bitch
Out of my back pocket
Sometime
But the river came
In my dreams
And called me east
To learn to flow
And merge with the ocean
To trust
And surrender
To evaporate into mist
And become rain again
Not unlike the Phoenix
To be changed
Reformed
But as part
Of a larger cycle
In service
And devotion
To that
Much Greater than itself.